I remember around the beginning of the year, i was talking about celebrating my 18th birthday next year. Time really flies. It's only less than 2 weeks away now. Honestly speaking, i'm quite scared. I have no idea when it started, but i have this weird fear for my own birthday. It's not really the fear of getting old but just fear. I remember i wanted to have a Macdonalds birthday party for my 18th birthday because i never had one and to have it on the 18th birthday is really meaningful to me because after 18, you're no longer a kid. You're legal, you're expected to behave like an adult. And i know it's not just a sudden wish to have a Macdonalds birthday when i have been searching it every time it's near my birthday and hoping i'll be able to celebrate it like that even if it's not on my actual date, even if it's a few days late. I wished for it for my 16th birthday. I had nothing. I'm wishing for it again for my 18th birthday. But. I guess know it can will never happen. My family will never hold that party for me and my auntie and cousin aren't in Singapore too. I don't wish to hold a birthday party with one aunt and cousin missing. And my family will never have that party for me to celebrate with my friends. I doubt they have the time to attend anyway. I guess this will be the first (and definitely not the last) biggest regret in my life: Not being able to have Macdonald birthday party. It may sound trivial and childish. But i means a lot to me. A lot. 
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